Episode 44: Perfectionism

I have noticed with brides and weddings, it really brings out this perfectionist monster. There's all of a sudden this idea that their wedding should or could possibly be perfect, and they should look perfect and act perfect and everyone else should be perfect.

The whole thing just takes on a life of its own and the perfectionist, the bad part of perfectionism really comes out. I get that it feels really true that you are a perfectionist, you have a very keen eye, you have a high standard, you have a specific sense of style you are very professional, and you want everyone else to be very professional and only submit the highest standard.

In this episode, we are discussing how there’s no perfect bride or wedding and why it’s impossible to leave space for the imperfect.



































I have noticed with brides and weddings, it really brings out this perfectionist monster. There's all of a sudden this idea that their wedding should or could possibly be perfect,

Episode 43: Vibes

So much of wedding talk is about wanting to create a vibe.

So many brides think a lot about how to create the vibe they going for on their wedding day. And while the atmosphere (venue, decor, etc) communicates certain energy or vibe, the strongest factor in creating the wedding vibe you want is to learn how to communicate it with your own energy.

In this episode, we are discussing how you can create the vibe you want for your wedding now just imagining it.


































So much of wedding talk is about wanting to create a vibe. So many brides think a lot about how to create the vibe they going for on their wedding day. 

Episode 42: I Just Want to Elope

Is it bad to be knee deep in planning and just ask yourself and your fiancé “wouldn’t it make more sense to just elope?” Whether it's the complicated logistics of hotel blocks and transportation, the unhappy family members who aren’t getting their way, the ballooning expenses, or just the overwhelm of the sheer amount of decisions.

Maybe it’s just that the wedding has become a bit of a monster that has taken over your entire relationship and you miss the life you had before wedding planning.

In this episode, we are talking about how it’s normal and predictable to be completely over it and want to just bag it all and elope.

































Is it bad to be knee deep in planning and just ask yourself and your fiancé “wouldn’t it make more sense to just elope?”

Episode 41: Feel Good on the Big Day



How can you manage your feelings on the big day?

How can you make sure you feel the way you want to feel?

You want to feel good. You want to enjoy it. You want to be happy. You want to be present and soak it all in. But how?

It can feel like it’s the thing you have the least control over. You think that you have to wait to see what happens in order to know how you are going to feel.

In this episode, I just want you to flip the paradigm a bit. Your wedding day isn’t going to tell you how to feel, you are going to tell your wedding day how your feel.




























How can you manage your feelings on the big day? How can you make sure you feel the way you want to feel? You want to feel good. You want to enjoy it. You want to be happy. You want to be present and soak it all in. 

Episode 40: the story of your wedding

I want to remind you today that your wedding is a changing thing. At one point, it was a dream, a vision, or a fantasy. Then at some point, your wedding becomes a possibility. You are dating someone you can envision marrying, suddenly the possibility of your own wedding is within your reachable reality.

Then if you are engaged and planning a wedding, your wedding becomes a choice, a reality, and an event. It can become a source of joy, and pain. It can be a dream, a nightmare, or both at the same time.

Then as your wedding gets closer, it’s a day, an event, and a significant moment in time. Then, poof, it will be done. It will be over. It will be gone and it will morph into a memory, a photograph, a story.





























I want to remind you today that your wedding is a changing thing. At one point, it was a dream, a vision, or a fantasy. Then at some point, your wedding becomes a possibility.

Episode 39: What Do You Yearn For?

When we think about weddings, we think about what we want them to be. Where we want them, what it will look like, the flowers, the music, the dress, the food, the dance floor, the guest list, and all the details. We think about Pinterest, Instagram, and Tik Tok. We think about the movies we have seen, we think about the weddings we’ve been to, and the images that have been in our minds.

I love that. I want you to have what you want. Whether it is peonies, a mermaid cut dress, a black and white dance floor, or a major design moment with your escort cards. I am so into all of it. Yet, if we don’t ask ourselves the deeper question, our wants can feel really empty. They can fail to deliver on the happiness that they seemed to promise. In this episode, I want you to ask yourself a million times what do I want and let yourself go nuts.
































When we think about weddings, we think about what we want them to be. Where we want them, what it will look like, the flowers, the music, the dress, the food, the dance floor, the guest list, and all the details.

Episode 38: Your Wedding Demands It

Weddings seem to come with demand. It requires something of you and you usually aren’t prepared to think about it or tackle it. It can seem really unrelated to your actual wedding, yet it becomes an obstacle that stands right between you and your happy day.

Shouldn’t it be as simple as just making decisions and choosing things that work for our budgets and preferences and cultures and families?

In this episode, I am discussing that whatever your wedding is demanding of you, how to stop trying to scoot around it and how to go towards it.































Weddings seem to come with demand. It requires something of you and you usually aren’t prepared to think about it or tackle it. It can seem really unrelated to your actual wedding, yet it becomes an obstacle that stands right between you and your happy day.

Episode 37: The Field

There is a quote by the Persian poet Rumi, “Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing there is a field. I'll meet you there.”

I mean, can you even take it. This idea is just so fabulous. Just think of all the ways you can apply this to the drama happening in your world right now.

So much of the conflict I see with brides is around wanting to do things right or litigating who did something wrong and our brains get really stuck in right and wrong land.

In this episode, we discuss if it is really important to be right and what it can cost you.





























There is a quote by the Persian poet Rumi, “Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing there is a field. I'll meet you there.” I mean, can you even take it. This idea is just so fabulous.

Episode 36: Bridal beauty

Bridal beauty is a huge industry. Many brides will whiten their teeth, start botox, start working out, diet, get facials, get manicures, go tanning, or get eyelash extensions.

So many things go on in the glam world when a woman is planning a wedding.
There is so much pressure to look the best you’ve ever looked.

In this episode, we are going to pause and acknowledge the weirdness of the bridal beauty industry. It’s alright to want to look your best, but it’s also okay to keep getting better.




























Bridal beauty is a huge industry. Many brides will whiten their teeth, start botox, start working out, diet, get facials, get manicures, go tanning, or get eyelash extensions.

Episode 35: What Wants to Happen

So many brides have strong visions of their weddings. Often based on old visions, movies, Instagram, or Pinterest.

We get so so bombarded by trends and images it can be really difficult to know whether what we want is authentically true to our deepest desire or whether we have been specialized to want it.

In talking to brides throughout the pandemic who have had to shift and postpone and replan and unplan, it really drove home the usefulness of this concept- what wants to happen?

In this episode, we are going to be diving into how to come at your wedding with a little bit of a looser hold on that wedding vision.


























So many brides have strong visions of their weddings. Often based on old visions, movies, Instagram, or Pinterest. We get so bombarded by trends and images it can be really difficult to know whether what we want is authentically true to our deepest desire.

Episode 34: Le Pause

Have you ever heard the phrase Le Pause?

Le Pause is a french baby sleep training technique where when you hear your baby cry in the middle of the night, you don’t rush straight away to get them, you give it a pause, and see if they resettle.

I love this idea and I am advocating that we bring Le Pause to the bridal journey.

Most brides jump right to wedding planning as soon as they are engaged but what if we took a pause here instead?
























I love this idea and I am advocating that we bring Le Pause to the bridal journey. Most brides jump right to wedding planning as soon as they are engaged but what if we took a pause here instead?

Episode 33: My Friendship Lesson

Today I just want to give you a little lesson on friendship from my own wedding.

When it comes to choosing a bridal party, it can be hard to choose between family and friends. For my wedding, I decided I wanted a small bridal party so my friends wouldn’t feel burdened because being a bridesmaid can be draining.

But there’s a lot that happens on your wedding day and I learned that I should have trusted my friends more and have had the nuanced conversation.






















Today I just want to give you a little lesson on friendship from my own wedding. When it comes to choosing a bridal party, it can be hard to choose between family and friends.    

Episode 32: Why Brides

Today I want to answer a question I get a lot - why brides? People want to know why I don’t focus on couples.

The answer is simple: the male experience of getting married is very different from a woman’s. Wedding culture shows this focus on the bride and what her wedding means about her.

It all comes back to the history of weddings and the different viewpoints we have had on weddings.

Listen in as I discuss why I am committed and secure in my decision to focus my work on brides.




















Today I want to answer a question I get a lot - why brides? People want to know why I don’t focus on couples. The answer is simple: the male experience of getting married is very different from a woman’s. 

Episode 31: Let Them be Wrong


If  you are like me, you want people to understand you, to get you. I have learned that there isn’t always room for it, in the place, time, or setting that you want.

So let them be wrong.

I am obsessed with this mantra right now. There is something so freeing about it and it comes up so much in wedding planning.

In this episode, we are going to dive into relieving your anxiety with this one simple phrase - Let them be wrong.

















If you are like me, you want people to understand you, to get you. I have learned that there isn’t always room for it, in the place, time, or setting that you want. So let them be wrong.

Episode 30: Bridesmaid Ghosting

Where do my friendships fit in once you get married?

We know weddings cause the relationship group to shift beneath us but friendship really is connected to our survival

In this episode, I am going to be talking about a trend I’ve noticed around bridesmaid ghosting. When your nearest and dearest just sorta going silent and it’s obviously really stressful on a bride.

















Where do my friendships fit in once you get married? We know weddings cause the relationship group to shift beneath us but friendship really is connected to our survival

Episode 29: Wedding Essence

What is the first thing you should do when planning a wedding?

In this episode, we are talking about the essential ingredient you need before you even start planning your wedding - your intention.

Listen in as I discuss the importance of getting quiet and really deciding what you want out of your wedding.
















What is the first thing you should do when planning a wedding? In this episode, we are talking about the essential ingredient you need before you even start planning your wedding - your intention.

Episode 28: Guest List Drama

One of the biggest issues coming up lately is the guest list drama.

We start feeling badly about not inviting people, like friends that we have lost touch with or certain family members. Plus there’s the issue with people who don’t RSVP or decline the invitation.

There is no rule that you have to invite someone because they expect to be invited.















One of the biggest issues coming up lately is the guest list drama. We start feeling badly about not inviting people, like friends that we have lost touch with or certain family members. 

Episode 27: Hard Conversations

As you have noticed weddings bring up a lot of things for a lot of people.

You are probably going to find yourself having to have a lot of tricky conversations that you never saw coming.

The most important thing you can do is have them. Giving people you care about the dignity of a face-to-face conversation is a beautiful gesture that can change the tone and trajectory of a relationship.














As you have noticed weddings bring up a lot of things for a lot of people. You are probably going to find yourself having to have a lot of tricky conversations that you never saw coming.

Episode 26:  How to Decide

As a bride, you're going to be making a lot of decisions and it can easily lead to overwhelm. This is one of the biggest causes of bridal blues and overwhelm: just too many decisions.

One of the biggest blocks to knowing what we want is that we don’t let ourselves just simply want what we want. We are afraid of our own desires.

So let’s talk about a few ways to make decision-making easier and less draining.













As a bride, you're going to be making a lot of decisions and it can easily lead to overwhelm. This is one of the biggest causes of bridal blues and overwhelm: just too many decisions.

Episode 25: Sibling Situation

The sibling experience is probably one of the most under-discussed aspects of the family drama unfolding during engagements.

I think so many times people underestimate the siblings’ thoughts and feelings and what they go through when their sister gets married.

It's so important to remember that you getting married is completely reshaping your family.












The sibling experience is probably one of the most under-discussed aspects of the family drama unfolding during engagements.

Episode 24: Simple Stress Solution

One of the things I hate the most about the dominant narrative around weddings is the image of the constantly stressed-out bride. Stress isn’t meant to be a prolonged state.

Stress is fine and to be expected when tackling big, new, or complex challenges but it should subside.

Wedding stress can be very tricky but listen in as I discuss, identifying your stress, tools to use to ease your stress, and rewarding yourself.











One of the things I hate the most about the dominant narrative around weddings is the image of the constantly stressed-out bride. Stress isn’t meant to be a prolonged state.

Episode 23: Regret Proof Your Wedding

One of the reasons making all the wedding decisions can be so stressful is that you don’t want to have any regrets. You are spending a lot of money and the photos will last forever and you don’t want to look back and regret your color scheme or your dress or even your bridal party choices.

What if I told you there were no wrong choices. There were the choices that you made for the reasons and circumstances the present situation allowed.











One of the reasons making all the wedding decisions can be so stressful is that you don’t want to have any regrets. You are spending a lot of money and you don’t want to look back and regret your color scheme or your dress.

Episode 22: Great Expectations

If there is one thing I could tell every couple getting married, it’s that the biggest risk to your engagement journey, from wedding planning to the big day to the newlywed year- is expectations.

Expectations are those notions that live inside our heads that we are mostly unaware of. We kinda think it’s just normal, or we mistakenly think that everyone shares the same expectations. We tend to live inside our own expectations.











If there is one thing I could tell every couple getting married, it’s that the biggest risk to your engagement journey, from wedding planning to the big day to the newlywed year- is expectations.

Episode 21: Home for the Holidays

In today’s episode, we are talking about the holidays - so many images of family togetherness, elaborate meals, festive decorations, favorite movies, gorgeous gifts, and lots of laughter (or this is what Hallmark movies make us believe it should be).

But the holidays can be a source of anxiety, overwhelm, frustration, and sadness for a lot of people. This makes the holidays a lot like weddings, in our mind it’s all pretty and happy and fun but in reality, it’s so much more complicated than that.











In today’s episode, we are talking about the holidays - so many images of family togetherness, elaborate meals, festive decorations, favorite movies, gorgeous gifts, and lots of laughter (or this is what Hallmark movies make us believe it should be).

Episode 20: How to Start a Fight

One thing we know about marriage is that there will be conflict. It’s inevitable.

So many people try to avoid it, thinking if they can just not fight that they will be better off. Of course, avoiding conflict isn’t a healthy move- issues will linger, resentments will build. The most interesting thing about marital conflict is that it’s mostly unresolvable. Yikes!

So all the energy and passion that goes into those fights doesn’t tend to get us the outcome of resolution that we so desire.











One thing we know about marriage is that there will be conflict. It’s inevitable. So many people try to avoid it, thinking if they can just not fight that they will be better off. Of course, avoiding conflict isn’t a healthy move- issues will linger, resentments will build.

Episode 19: Help. Thank You. Wow.


Wedding planning can be tough- the opinions, the pressure, the money. But we do it because it’s also magical- the ritual, the dancing, the dress. In many ways, the journey from engagement to the wedding day is rocky for good reason.

You are going to have to decide how you are going to manage yourself within this new ecosystem of married life. It can be stressful and draining while also exciting and beautiful.











Wedding planning can be tough- the opinions, the pressure, the money. But we do it because it’s also magical- the ritual, the dancing, the dress. In many ways, the journey from engagement to the wedding day is rocky for good reason

Episode 18: Wedding Happiness Guarantee



One of the most intense things about planning a wedding is that after all the time and effort and money, how do you even make sure you are happy on the actual day?

So many things could potentially happen. There is so much riding on this day- can those 8 hours live up to the hype of your own expectations, your childhood fantasies, months of planning, so many conversations. It certainly is a lot of pressure.










One of the most intense things about planning a wedding is that after all the time and effort and money, how do you even make sure you are happy on the actual day?


Episode 17: Trust

Today I want to talk a little bit about a big topic. Trust.

For couples getting married those same trust issues are still there, just slightly different. So often we want a road map or a checklist or a diagnostic test to determine whether the person we love can be trusted. That question “how do I truly trust someone?” is a tough one. But it’s also the wrong one. A lot of what’s underneath the notion of trust is control- we are yearning to control how we will be treated ahead of time and trust is the name we put on it.












Today I want to talk a little bit about a big topic. Trust. For couples getting married those same trust issues are still there, just slightly different..

Episode 16: Nothing has gone wrong here

Today I want to talk about a little mantra- Nothing has gone wrong here. It’s a sentence or a thought that you can choose when shit hits the fan. When you are planning a wedding, I promise you that will happen.

There is just something so magical about wedding planning but it brings up so much for so many people. Weddings make people super reflective about their pasts, their futures, their hopes, their dreams, their regrets, their heartbreaks.

Listen in as I discuss, choosing your own thoughts, how to overcome bizarre challenges, and finding evidence to support your thoughts.











Today I want to talk about a little mantra- Nothing has gone wrong here. It’s a sentence or a thought that you can choose when shit hits the fan. When you are planning a wedding, I promise you that will happen.

Episode 15: Rest

Today I want to talk about rest. I am a huge fan of rest and our culture often vilifies rest and we end up feeling guilty for resting thinking we should be working. When we should be resting, it’s so easy to press play on another episode on Netflix or scroll Instagram.

But today I want to talk about a type of resting called Intentional Resting. It’s a concept developed by Dan Howard and I have found it to be really powerful.

Listen in as I discuss, a powerful way to use rest to prepare for your wedding, how resting helps your relationships, and affirmations to use to invoke the feeling of rest.










Today I want to talk about rest. I am a huge fan of rest and our culture often vilifies rest and we end up feeling guilty for resting thinking we should be working.


Episode 14: Can You Just be Happy for Me?

Getting engaged is that short window in life where everything is magical and full of hope and possibility.

So why would anyone need a life coach during this time?

Most people who have been through this season of life will tell you that it is far more of an emotional rollercoaster than most people anticipate.

Listen in as I discuss, how maybe more time is needed, looking at the way you talk about your engagement, and giving others grace.








Getting engaged is that short window in life where everything is magical and full of hope and possibility. So why would anyone need a life coach during this time?



Episode 13: Love Maps

In today’s episode let’s talk about marriage prep. So little focus is placed on marriage prep.

It’s so important to take the time to reflect on what our marriage is going to be about and the principles and pillars that make up the years ahead of us.

Listen in as I discuss, laying out a road map that works for both of you, why you should start practicing your love map, and how love maps can help conflicts in your marriage.









In today’s episode let’s talk about marriage prep. So little focus is placed on marriage prep. It’s so important to take the time to reflect on what our marriage is going to be about and the principles and pillars that make up the years ahead of us.

Episode 12: Weddings without Religion

More and more people are marrying people of different faiths, cultures, and traditions. This means that the default church wedding that we always see in movies doesn’t play out that naturally for so many of us.

How much of what we believe in is just because it’s what we were taught growing up?

Listen in as I discuss, why you don’t have to have a religious ceremony, keeping your identity in your wedding, and the magic of creating something new.








More and more people are marrying people of different faiths, cultures, and traditions. This means that the default church wedding that we always see in movies doesn’t play out that naturally for so many of us.

Episode 11: Hold Two Things


I want to give you a really simple reminder that is key for your wedding but also for your life and it’s a phrase I come back to time and time again and it’s, hold two things.

It’s about the duality of life. There are always opposing things happening at the same time.

Listen in as I discuss, the importance of holding two things, how holding two things can make your wedding day better, and the feeling you will get by holding two things.






I want to give you a really simple reminder that is key for your wedding but also for your life and it’s a phrase I come back to time and time again and it’s, hold two things.

Episode 10: Premembering Your Wedding

I want to talk today on the podcast about a fun little exercise that helps brides with energy management and preventing those bridal blues.

Once it’s all said and done, all we have left of our wedding is the memories. But you don’t have to wait until it’s over to start remembering.

Listen in as I discuss, the visualization that you can use to premember your wedding, how to stay in control of your emotions, and controlling your energy.






I want to talk today on the podcast about a fun little exercise that helps brides with energy management and preventing those bridal blues.


Episode 9: How to Write Your Vows

In addition to being a life coach and helping brides with their wedding drama, I am also a wedding officiant.

I love helping couples create their own ceremony that is true to them and the history of their families.

In this episode, I’m giving you the 6 part structure to writing your vows that is easy, fun, and keeps your vows balanced.





In addition to being a life coach and helping brides with their wedding drama, I am also a wedding officiant. I love helping couples create their own ceremony that is true to them and the history of their families.


Episode 8: What's In a Name?

The name change. It’s a big part of getting married. Most of us assumed we would change our names when we got married. Until the time comes to change your name. It’s weirdly unnerving.

Suddenly you are supposed to just have a different name. Talk about an identity crisis. Even though you expected it, it feels weird.

Expect it to be uncomfortable. Decide for yourself what you want to do. Think about your career, your kids, and then talk to your fiance. You might be surprised to hear how much it matters to him or the opposite. He might really want you to keep your name.




The name change. It’s a big part of getting married. Most of us assumed we would change our names when we got married. Until the time comes to change your name. It’s weirdly unnerving.


Episode 7: Creativity & Constraint


As I am recording this, it’s the summer of 2021- we are crawling out of a pandemic after nearly a year and a half. A pandemic that locked down most of the country, and the world, and obviously also shut the wedding industry down in its tracks.

The rescheduling began. Things got complicated but also, people got really creative. People started to have these insanely intimate and beautiful ceremonies. They zoomed them. They wore their dress, they had incredible floral installations, they had them in yards, in front of fireplaces. We called them micro weddings but they were maximum on love, romance, beauty, detail.



As I am recording this, it’s the summer of 2021- we are crawling out of a pandemic after nearly a year and a half. A pandemic that locked down most of the country, and the world, and obviously also shut the wedding industry down in its tracks.

The rescheduling began. Things got complicated but also, people got really creative. People started to have these insanely intimate and beautiful ceremonies. They zoomed them. They wore their dress, they had incredible floral installations, they had them in yards, in front of fireplaces. We called them micro weddings but they were maximum on love, romance, beauty, detail.

Episode 6: Your Parents

Our culture is so singularly focused on the romantic love narrative that I think it really misses out on the love story that’s also wrapped into the wedding day- specifically with our parents.

Parents think about the day- who they will be on that day, how they will feel, it’s a completion of their job in many ways. They think about how they pay for it.

The bottom line is your parents are going through a major change and all of the emotion that comes with it. They are dealing with the relationship reshuffle, the new family dynamic, and the new life phase



The bridezilla myth adds this extra layer of stress for brides. They are so worried about becoming a bridezilla that they are not processing their emotions of what is actually underneath that.

Episode 5: Wedding & Friendships

Sometimes our friendships can suffer when we get engaged and start planning a wedding.

Yes, change changes things. Nothing has gone wrong, avoid the instinct to cut people off and try to make them understand. Allow your friends to have that processing time.

In this episode, I am going over the five different themes as ways our friendships can suffer when we get engaged.


The bridezilla myth adds this extra layer of stress for brides. They are so worried about becoming a bridezilla that they are not processing their emotions of what is actually underneath that.

Episode 4: bridezilla myth

In today’s episode, we are going to take a look at what the term, bridezilla, does for women, brides, and the wedding industry.

The bridezilla myth adds this extra layer of stress for brides. They are so worried about becoming a bridezilla that they are not processing their emotions of what is actually underneath that.

Listen in as I discuss, what the term bridezilla means, how society puts pressure on brides, and what you can do if you feel yourself becoming a bridezilla.The bridezilla myth adds this extra layer of stress for brides. They are so worried about becoming a bridezilla that they are not processing their emotions of what is actually underneath that.

Listen in as I discuss, what the term bridezilla means, how society puts pressure on brides, and what you can do if you feel yourself becoming a bridezilla.graph

The bridezilla myth adds this extra layer of stress for brides. They are so worried about becoming a bridezilla that they are not processing their emotions of what is actually underneath that.

In today’s episode, we are talking about all the negative emotions that brides feel that we don’t really make space for in our culture.

We expect brides to be all smiles and pretend that nothing is wrong. We don’t give brides the opportunity to have the full range of emotions that a change like this requires.

Listen in as I discuss the 4 squares of the change cycle you go through as you prepare for your wedding.

Episode 3: Bridal Blues & Change

We expect brides to be all smiles and pretend that nothing is wrong. We don’t give brides the opportunity to have the full range of emotions that a change like this requires.

Episode 2: what is wedding drama?

In today’s episode we are diving into wedding drama and why is it never about what it’s about. Wedding drama is real but it has the potential to be magic.

So much of wedding drama is letting go of your old life and stepping into a new one. Brides feel so much pressure leading up to their weddings and that’s when the drama can set in.

Listen in as I discuss, the pressures of social media, listening to everyone else and not ourselves, and the impact your wedding can have on your friendships.

So much of wedding drama is letting go of your old life and stepping into a new one. Brides feel so much pressure leading up to their weddings and that’s when the drama can set in.

Episode 1: What is bridal coaching

Welcome to the Whispers to a Bride Podcast. In this first episode, I am explaining the fundamentals about what is bridal coaching and how it can help you.

There is so much focus on wedding preparation and looking good for your wedding but we don’t focus on how to have more peace in your own mind, your own heart, and your relationships.

Listen in as I discuss, how bridal coaching can help your entire married life, the missing piece I discovered to planning a wedding, and the importance of relationships during this time.

There is so much focus on wedding preparation and looking good for your wedding but we don’t focus on how to have more peace in your own mind, your own heart, and your relationships.